Thursday, August 30, 2018

Dear Oblivious,

Hands down, you're everyone's' favorite person at the grocery store. Your fellow shoppers love it when you meander down a narrow and congested aisle with your cart while FaceTiming. The resulting chaos around you is truly food for the spirit. The sense of fulfillment we feel upon successfully navigating around you is surpassed only by the thrill of standing behind you, listening to your inane drivel as you block off access to the bananas.

Any by all means, please get in the express checkout lane with your 29 items. Then top off the experience for us by leaving your empty shopping cart in a handicapped parking spot.

You rock.

Sincerely,

Us Annoying Maggots You Share This Planet With
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